“Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends.”
–One Stab, Legends of the Fall

 
This is a great quote from one of my favorite movies. It brings to mind how simple, yet how complex it can be to live your life listening to and being guided by your inner voice. And how hearing and listening to your inner voice can give you clarity, direction and peace of mind–and help you fulfill your life’s intention.

So what is your inner voice? To me it is your authentic self and your intuitive self—intuitive as in your natural instincts and the voice of your soul’s purpose. One way to look at it is that your inner voice is your soul’s whispers to you—the hints about where to turn or go, quiet guidance that gets louder when you don’t at first listen to it; where your intentions are set and where reminders of your passions live; where ideas are formed and imagination is fueled; and where your emotions and feelings are grounded.

Your inner voice is yours and yours alone. It knows what is best for you at any given time and functions always in your best interest and in ways that the rational mind can’t always understand. Sometimes—and we have all experienced this—your inner voice may not make sense to your logical mind.

Many of us have experienced that feeling of something not “feeling” right—where your senses are heightened, things may not “add up,” etc., but logically you can’t articulate or define why in that moment. It just is and when you act based on that inner voice you feel safe, content, better—that you did the “right” thing. Your inner voice provides you with internal guidance that never fails you.

At times it can be difficult to be in tune with your inner voice, and not only to listen but to live by your inner voice. There are so many distractions—over stimuli in our daily lives that result in physical and mental noise. In a world of data and more data, we begin to believe that we need evidence to make the “right” decision or take an action.

Then there are expectations (Freeing Yourself of Expectations) that we impose on ourselves and that others impose upon us. And we let ourselves be influenced by the opinions of others—since we become unsure of ourselves. We start to not trust our “gut” or intuition and (back to the world of data) there seems to be unspoken (negative) judgments about going by your “gut.”

Steve Jobs in his speech to the graduating class as Stanford University soon after his diagnosis of terminal cancer told the graduating class, “Don’t let the voice of others’ opinions drown out your inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.”

Take time to listen—really listen—to your inner voice. Don’t discount it. Don’t question it. Don’t turn your back on it when others question you or think you are not making sense. Learn to trust it and embrace it.

Your inner voice is not going to be heard like a literal voice. It whispers (or sometimes shouts) to you in many, many ways. These include gut feelings or hunches, dreams (day or night), moments of clarity (Clarity), impulse moments, repeated urges to do something; and in physical ways such as a shiver, goosebumps, waking up suddenly in the night, and many others. Pay attention to what you are feeling–and don’t over-think it. Acknowledge that this is your inner voice reaching out to you–telling you something. Listen to it!

To hear your inner voice consistently and to grow your trust in it, it helps to dedicate quite time each day when you can connect to your thoughts and emotions. For some, they like to do this in a meditative state or in a quite space. For others, they can do this when being active, such as when exercising, driving to work, taking a walk, cooking, etc. It’s important to make this part of your routine so that you don’t let the outer stimuli and others’ voices and expectations and demands drown out your inner voice. I would love to hear from you on how you hear your inner voice and the difference it has made in your life.

As we journey through our lives and even through a determined process of change we tend to live in and set expectations. Expectations take many forms—from what we expect of ourselves to what others expect of us, and what we expect of others. They are somewhat “inbred” in us from our upbringing, lifestyle, experiences, etc.

In short, we all have a multitude of small expectations that present themselves everyday–expectations on how people should behave, how someone should dress for a work meeting, when someone should call us back after a date, etc. And we have larger expectations–which may be fewer but they have a more pronounced, deep or emotional impact. These may include expectations of your chosen life style, of relationships, of belief systems, etc.

This week I will be writing about vitality. As you work on getting your mind, body and soul aligned and work on becoming the best you you can be, the concept of vitality and the strength of vitality is centrally important to the well being of not only your body or physical self, but also of your mind and soul.

“Diversity is not about how we differ. Diversity is about embracing one another’s uniqueness.”

The human race is so extraordinary diverse in so many ways. The concept of diversity encompasses acceptance and respect. It means appreciating that each of us is unique, and recognizes that with those differences come different strengths and abilities. It is about understanding each other and celebrating the rich dimensions of diversity contained within each individual and embracing the unique warrior (Embrace the Warrior) in ourselves and others.

These differences can be of age, race, color, gender, sexual orientation, life style, philosophy, culture, disabilities, religious beliefs, or other ideologies. These are also in how we each think, react, process information, communicate, work, rest, love, etc.  The areas in which we differ are simply endless.

Valuing diversity recognizes differences between people. It embraces that these differences are the ingredients that add to rich and meaningful life experiences.

It is human nature to gravitate to others who have similar characteristics, beliefs, values, thoughts, patterns, etc., and to be with “like minded” people.  But think about it–and ask yourself as you go through your process of change and your daily life–are you limiting yourself and others by getting too comfortable in this state and maybe even inadvertently closing yourself off to socializing, working with and meeting others?

By rejecting or not fully accepting the uniqueness or diversity of others, are you creating barriers to your growth and progress, and even more so, hindering the growth and the potential of community? Diversity is a fertile source of strength, creativity and innovation. Through its synthesis it gives rise to the power of the whole.

Common joys and pains may bring us together. Heritage and tradition may give us roots. Culture, values and beliefs may center us. But diversity makes us unique. Diversity resides in each of us (The Language of Your Soul) and adds to the richness not only of who we are but more importantly to the richness of the whole.

Key to truly embracing diversity is an open heart and mind, not being judgmental–and appreciating and being grateful for the differences we all have. Understanding and accepting people from all walks of life is key to finding peace in our lives. Remember that diversity is a word that encourages inclusion by illuminating what is different in all of us. We should celebrate our unique selves and others. And reflect that all of us have intrinsic, unique value. Diversity is a gift that we should cherish.

To help inspire you in embracing diversity and the unique warrior in each of us, here is a link to “I Am Diversity, Please Include Me” by Charles Bennafield

http://simmaliebermansinclusionblog.blogspot.com/2012/03/i-am-diversity-outstanding-poem.html

Enjoy!

“The adventure of life is to learn. The purpose of life is to grow. The nature of life is to change.  The challenge of life is to overcome. The essence of life is to care. The opportunity of life is to serve. The secret of life is to dare. The spice of life is to befriend. The beauty of life is to give.”

― William Arthur Ward

This week I want to continue our discussion on leadership. Last week we talked about the quiet leader (Quiet Leadership) and that in all of us is a leader; by being true to ourselves (The Language of Your Soul) and to those around us we lead through simple acts that are brave and courageous—and touch people’s lives. All too often leaders are thought to be these great beings, exalted and revered.

A lot of what is written about leadership and how to be a great or effective leader is in the context of making decisions in challenging times and taking charge, or putting oneself on the line—so much so that we confuse leaders with heroes having super powers. This is pretty daunting! And makes some of us look for hints and to-do’s on being a leader and to try to emulate someone else who we think is a great leader; and can even make some of us shy away from embracing the leader in ourselves.

First, let’s start out by saying there is no such thing as a universal leader—there is no one model that if followed will make someone a strong or effective leader. Leaders are in all walks of life, and they do not share the same traits. As unique as you are, is as unique the leadership qualities and traits you possess. These qualities and traits are interwoven into the fabric of you—catalyzed by your experiences, wired into your soul’s purpose and exhibited in the current space and time in which you are.

Your inner leader is fueled by what you really believe in and what you are trying to do, the difference that you make in the world and how you impart this so it is contagious. And this does not have to be on a large scale or one to many—sometimes it is as simple as one to one, and that one to one—since it touched or inspired another—is passed on to others through more one to ones. And most times, strong leaders are the “unexpected ones”—those who aren’t trying so hard to be leaders! They just are.

Most of us—the leader we are and the leaders that touch our lives—don’t have any formal leadership role or title. If we have titles they are titles of teacher, friend, mother, father, etc. Leaders are often people in our daily lives and even those put on our path for a brief moment that leave a piece of themselves with us—and sometimes we don’t even notice in that moment, until we are grown or in a place and time dealing with a challenge that we take the piece to help us lead.

Today let’s start to embrace the leader in ourselves and recognize the authentic leaders who day in and day out add value to people’s lives. Let’s celebrate the unexpected leader who works quietly behind the scenes keeping people they work with and live with—in the communities in which they live and function—motivated, inspired, hopeful, calm, informed, educated, comforted and loved. Let’s embrace the leader in us and among us who takes the time to really listen, to be in the moment, to lend a helping hand, that provides wisdom and gentle guidance. Let’s appreciate the leader who knows when to step aside or follow.

Let’s recognize and accept that all of us—and the leaders we are—make mistakes—and forgive and learn from mistakes or missteps. Let’s celebrate the unexpected leader who comes out from behind the scenes to protect others, to advocate for values and beliefs—who inspire others for broader support for noble missions and purpose.

We have so much to learn from each other as leaders and the unexpected leaders who quietly guide and influence people and make our world a better place.  We all benefit from embracing that we all have different ways of thinking and communicating and how we approach the world. By having open minds and hearts we can see things in new ways and be inspired and inspire—and lead.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us . . .”  – Marianne Williamson

In today’s world where powerful leaders are defined, and even celebrated, by their bold, overt actions or by their financial and political influence played out in the public domain, we lose sight of the silent leaders among us and more importantly within ourselves. We lose sight of leadership as the everyday act of helping make a difference in someone’s life, touching their heart or feeding their soul.

We often think of leaders as being extroverts being in positions of authority having high levels of confidence and having strong personalities, and leading groups of people via setting vision and direction and motivating people to align behind a mission or purpose. Yes, these types of leaders do have their place–and can be inspirational and effective in driving social change and good. But for most of us we do see ourselves in these shoes.

And for some, leadership or being leaders seems elusive. As we go through our daily lives, we do not think we have opportunities to be great leaders because of our circumstances, our humility or personalities. We may even start to think of leadership as bigger than us.  But it is not.

Truth be told–we all lead at some part of our lives. We serve as leaders in our jobs, our communities and in our families. We all have the ability to be leaders. Leadership is not about power or superiority. It is about celebrating and releasing the potential of those around us. Enacting change through small genuine efforts, kind words, positive energy and pure and well intended thoughts are the hallmarks of quiet leadership.

Quiet leaders work behind the scenes and are unassuming–working quietly, carefully and with good intention and love. They live by their values, even when dealing with serious problems and presented with challenging dilemmas. There is no forceful action or imposing beliefs or thoughts onto others. It is by example and being true to themselves that they lead.

Quiet leaders recognize the uncertainty and complexity that are so much part of our lives, and they don’t assume the right thing to do is always clear. But by listening to their inner voice, tapping into their fabric of experiences and being true to themselves they do the right thing and lead–in usually very unassuming, subtle ways. So subtle that most people touched by this leadership may not always recognize it.

We all have the ability to be a catalyst in someone’s life by something we say or do. We as part of the connected universe can be so powerful in each others lives by being everyday leaders.  Quiet leadership is what moves and changes the world.

“The concept of time is the most perpetrated deception placed on mankind by mankind.”

– Rob LaBelle

The concept of time is an illusion and can be viewed as a deception. There are many spiritual and scientific thoughts and studies on this which I won’t, for now, delve into—but I do want to start to talk with you about time and the perception of time, and how it as a life measure can be holding you back or inadvertently putting obstacles in your way as you journey through your path to change, and life in general.

You ever notice how time as a life measure permeates our lives and our being? As we grow, especially into adulthood, we mark our lives by time. It is how we measure progress, how we measure success, how we measure experience, how we measure commitment, how we measure loyalty, how we measure love, etc.  When we set goals for ourselves we consciously, and even unconsciously, set time markers tied to expectations, expectation when we will achieve something, be somewhere or be some place—or even be happy or at peace.

As we evolve through life, we set milestones by self-imposed time frames. We do this for the most part because we define ourselves as finite creatures living in finite time. And we are conditioned to think this way by everyone in our lives and the generations before us. Since the day we are born the use of time and expectations of time have been instilled into us. The perception of time exists in our minds conditioned by our fellow humans.

This mindset of time as a life measure can be seen as a way to manage ourselves, our lives and even those in our lives; to put into some context where we are and why we are there—and some may say as a driver (to get things done, finish a project, be “on time”).  It makes sense to a degree in the physical world in which we currently live. But the mindset of time as a life measure can become unhealthy when it imposes, either by yourself or others, a set of expectations that set in motion a series of judgment, doubt, pressure, stress, etc.

When it crosses over to putting limitations on yourself.  When it starts to put you in a place of negative thinking and saying or even believing  things like “if I only had more time,” “I can’t do (fill in the blank) because I don’t have time,” “I’m too old to go back to school or work,” I’m too young or inexperienced to have that job,” etc. It can be  unhealthy when you start to think by putting in long hours that you will get ahead of the measure of time by checking more things off the “to-do” list or that you’ll expedite reaching your goals–but in reality this behavior is keeping you away from doing things you love or being with those you love.. It becomes damaging when it starts to work against the rhythm of your soul. You start to lose your Self (The Language of Your Soul).

This is when you need to step back and reflect (Reflections) on time as an illusion and how deceptive it can be, and to remember that the conditioning of time was formed before you could exercise conscious control. It is an inflection point when you need to think about how you may be using time as an observance of change and the impact it is having on you.

Change itself conveys a sense of time—but it does not have to. You have conscious control in how you think about time and how you can break the cycle of thinking of everything as past, present and future, and to let life unfold in the present and to think of your time or your experiences in the now as the now that has no boundaries.  As you continuously evolve yourself there is no need or reason to do so in the context of the minutes, hours, days, weeks or months. Your experiences and actions are not bound or defined by time. Time is an illusion.