In our world today there is a lot expectation, focus on fitting in, to be productive, to please others, to live a meaningful and impactful life and to find your purpose. This can create tremendous pressure and tension, not to mention distraction. In the midst of all we do everyday living in this paradigm, we can lose our unique voices. We start to use others’ words, concepts or ideas to express ourselves. We emulate others’ lives. We create desire for things or life styles that are not really what we want or even need. We may even follow beliefs that aren’t our own since we stop to question or maybe because it’s easier.

Yes, emulation to a certain degree is not wrong or damaging, since emulation is part of early growth and development. It helps us see what fits for us. It helps us try different personas on for size. But where it can become an issue is when we rely on it or lose the essence of ourselves. In order to find contentment, to live a meaningful live—a life of our soul’s intention—we must find our own voice. Our voices are not manufactured, they are uncovered and discovered.

Think of it from this perspective. The sources of the word “voice” are close to the Latin word vocare, which means to call or invoke. Our unique voice is the thing that is being called out in the midst of our living. One way to look at it is that your voice is the foundation or underlying why of who you are and your passions. 

But in today’s world filled with noise and distraction (e.g. ads, television, social media, constant “news,” judgement, criticism, etc.) we sometimes forget about our unique voice. We give up or get lost.

So how do you re-discover your voice?  First, define your voice as not just your vocal sound or original thought. Your voice is your body, your mind, your heart and your soul. They are all connected.

Ask yourself these questions—preferably when you are not distracted or rushed. Have a conversation with yourself about:

• What are you good at?
• What do you really love doing?
• What need can you serve?
• What do you feel like you should be doing?
• What one thing in the world would you change?

For most of us the answers will not coming flowing in or come in an amazing “ah-ha” moment. For most of us we may struggle with these questions, and for some, we may initially have an “I don’t know” response. This is OK. Think about it, we have become so conditioned to think and behave in a certain way. We are bombarded with all kinds of messaging. We live in a world of expectation and critical judgement, and have not had this honest conversation with ourselves for a very long time or if at all. Finding your voice is an evolving process, and you need to let that process happen.

For many, they live their lives in a state of quiet desperation—often deferring dreams and using the typical excuses of money or time. A first step to leaving this behind is to accept that you have a unique and special voice and it has infinite possibilities. Spend some time alone. Ease your mind in a few minutes of stillness. Listen to the world around you. What makes you happy, angry, sad, scared, etc. Listen to your emotions. Think about what inspires you and write it down. And always listen to your heart.

Own your platform. Build from where you are. Start from where you are. Do not dwell in the past or worry about the future. Think about what foundation you can build upon to begin affecting the kinds of change you would like to see in yourself and in the world around you.  Start your journey of finding your voice and letting it be heard.